Absolute Worst Show: Vacations

Wednesday, June 15th

The Absolute Worst is an interactive, open-mic comedy/storytelling show hosted by Meg Ferrill and Travis Abels, where audience members face off against three curated comedians and storytellers to find out who can lay claim to having gone through the worst experience ever based on that night’s theme, with both absolutely fabulous and absolutely terrible prizes at stake.

And for our June show, we’re looking to see who can lay claim to having been on the worst trip or vacation ever.

So if you have a great story about something terrible trip you regret ever having taken, you might walk away with the evening’s grand prize!

Maybe your worst vacation was that time your dad insisted your family drive all the way to Kentucky to see the world’s largest Ventriloquist Dummy Museum*. Or maybe it was the time you decided to have your wedding at Club Med, only to catch your new spouse in bed with your brother. Or maybe it was that business trip where you threw up on the Big Client you’d been sent to impress. Or maybe it was that one stay-cation where you’re spouse’s parents dropped in unannounced, or that trip to Vegas where you lost your life savings, or that one time you went to New Orleans, had way to much to drink, and woke up the next morning realizing you maybe possibly robbed a convenience store with this guy named Eddy you’d only just met because he said you’d be a wuss if you didn’t.

Don’t want to tell a story? No problem! You can still win a prize by winning our It Could Be Worse Game, or giving the best answer to our Absolute Worst Question Of The Night, or being crowned the Absolute Best Audience Member, or some other prize that we’ll probably just make up as we go.

Also, we may ask everyone to howl at the moon. Or we may not. (We’ll see.)

GET TICKETS

* We swear we are not making this museum up. We have actually been there, and some times late at night we still see it when we close our eyes, and we may never be entirely well again.

7DS Pants On Fire Double Header!

Saturday, July 18th

Join us as we host Portland’s wildest and most interactive comedy and storytelling entertainment event with Pants On Fire! at the historic White Eagle Hotel & Saloon.

As always, you’ll hear eight of the Norhtwest’s premier storytellers, comedians, artists, writers, celebrities & musicians telling some of the most outrageous, hard-to-believe, 100% true stories you've ever heard — except that one of our storytellers will be lying to your face, telling a complete whopper that never happened.

And as always, if you can guess which of our storytellers is the liar, you could win an overnight stay at the Edgefield Winery on us. Or you can try to win the Bag O’ Somewhat Valuable Prizes with our Two Truths & A Lie Audience Cage Match!

But this time, you have two Pants On Fire! shows to choose from:

Pants On Fire: Family/Friendly

Our early show, Pants On Fire: Family/Friendly, will be all ages, featuring eight of the most amazing, hard-to-believe s stories you’ll ever hear — one of them, of course, being entirely made up. It will be a great early-evening affair, and one of the first shows we’ve ever done where young adults can join in the fun. (Please note that although the show is all-ages, many stories will likely be more PG-13 than G; as such it is recommended for young adults and adults.)

6:00 PM at the White Eagle - GET TICKETS

THE FILTHY/FREAKY SHOW!

Our late show, Pants On Fire: Filthy/Freaky, will be 21 and over only, and will feature eight incredibly sinful, decidedly not-safe-for-work stories that will be just as amazing and hard-to-believe as the ones form the early show.

9:00 PM at the White Eagle - GET TICKETS

So pick a show, grab your tix, and come out to hear a night of the best stories you’ll ever not believe. It’s going to be a blast.

A Quick Note About Changes With Pants On Fire Tickets!

If you’ve been to the show before, you know some of our fans arrive super early — leaving others disappointed with the lack of stage-area seating when they arrive. Because of this starting with our March show, at the request of McMenamins White Eagle, we will be changing up the way Pants On Fire tickets will be sold.

There will now be three tiers of tickets you can purchase:

‘TABLE’ SEATING — These tickets will be a little more expensive than our old GA tickets ($30 plus fees). However, if you buy them you will be guaranteed either a two-top or three-top table. (As you might expect, the two-top ticket gets you admission for two people, and the three-top ticket gets you admission for three people.)

‘SEATED’ SEATING — These tickets will be the same price as our old GA tickets ($20 plus fees). They will guarantee you either a seat at that large family style table, the bar, or in the white stage-area seats with no tables.

‘STANDING’ SEATING — These oxymoronically named tickets will be half the price of our old GA tickets ($10 plus fees). These tickets will be for those who wish to stand in the stage area, as well as for those are cool sitting in the back-section tables and booths near the entrance of the bar.

None of this is etched in stone, so please: let us know how you like/don’t like the new system! We can always tweak it or go back to the Olde Ways if need be.